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Chim Chim Cheree, song lyrics

Song: Chim Chim Cheree
Lyrics: Allan Sherman(1)

Music: to the tune "Chim Chim Cheree" from "Mary Poppins"
Year: 1965
Genre: Comedy parody
Country: USA


Chim chiminey, chim chiminey, Chim chim cheree,
Those are three words that don't make sense to me,
But I'm used to words that don't make sense to me,
From all those commercials I see on TV.
When I see an ad that can't be understood,
I know that the product has got to be good!
Those words may be crazy, but I think they're great,
Like sodium acetylsalicylate(2).

I wake up each morning a most happy man,
I cover my Pic-o-pay(3) with Flouristan(4),
I add Hexachlorophene(5) 'cause it's so pure,
And then GL-70(6) just to make sure.
Then I take a shower, but never alone,
I'm in there with Dermasil(7) and Silicone(8).
I brush by Vitriol-D(9) on my Lanolin(10) wave(11),
And I sharpen my boo-boop and use it to shave.

There's Tufsyn(12), and Retsyn(13) and Acrylan(14) too,
And Marfak(15), and Melmac(16) and what else is new,
There's Orlon(17), and Korlan(18) and there's Accutron(19),
And Teflon(20), and Ban-lon(21) and so on and on.
These wonderful words spin around in my brain,
Each one is a mystery I cannot explain,
Like what does that Blue-Magic Whitener(22) do,
Does it make blue things white, or make white things blue?
This song was originally posted on protestsonglyrics.net
My fastback(23) has wide-track(24) and Autronic-Eye(25),
Which winks when a cute little Volvo(26) goes by,
My tank full of Platformate(27), starts with a roar,
But when I try to stop, it goes two miles more.
I measure my breathing with my Nasograph(28),
It's nice, but oh my, how it hurts when I laugh,
My chair is upholstered in real Naugahyde(29),
When they killed that nagha, I sat down and cried.

I'm giving a party next Saturday night,
And here are the friends that I'm going to invite,
The giant(30) who lives in my washing machine,
That other nice giant who's jolly and green(31).
The tiger(32) who causes my gas tank to flood,
That handsome white knight(33), who is stronger than crud.
The man with the eyepatch who sells me my shirts(34),
And that nut who flies into the front seat for Hertz(35)!
This song was originally posted on protestsonglyrics.net
I've lived all my life, in this weird Wonderland,
I keep buying things that I don't understand,
'Cause they promise me miracles, magic and hope,
But somehow it always turns out to be soap,
And they might as well be Chim Chiminey Cheree!


Notes:

1 - Allan Sherman (1924 - 1973), born as Allan Copelon in Chicago Illinois, and taking his mother's maiden name for a stage surname. He as a TV producer, comedian, and famous parody songwriter. This is his critique of the business of marketing and advertising.

2 - Sodium acetylsalicylate at the time was marketed as "soluble aspirin" (with aspirin being acetylsalicylic acid).

3 - Pic-o-pay was a powdered dentifrice (for brushing your teeth with).

4 - "Flouristan" was the trademarked name Crest (toothpaste) used for the common chemical stannous flouride.

5 - Hexachlorophene, a disinfectant that was used in some soaps.
This song was originally posted on protestsonglyrics.net
6 - "GL-70" was a trademarked name used in Gleem toothpaste, but what if anything it was has never been publicly divulged.

7 - Dermasil: a skin lotion.

8 - Silicones are a family of chemicals from oils to polymer-rubbers. This reference could be to silicone oils that can be used in hair conditioner to make hair shiny and slippery.

9 - Vitriol-D, was a type of hair gel, to make the hair stay in place.

10 - Lanolin was used as an ingredient in some hair shampoos. (Lanolin is mostly used as an emollient in skin moisturizers.)

11 - Wave: a hairstyle.

12 - Tufsyn, a Goodyear trademarked name for a rubber chemical mixture used in automobile tires.

13 - Retsyn, a trademarked name for a mixture in Certs breath mints. Retsyn, is a combination of a combination of partially hydrogenated cottonseed oil, copper gluconate and flavoring, with the flavoring giving the mint its taste and the copper gluconate giving it the green coloring.

14 - "Acrylan" is probably a mispelling of "Acrilan", an acrylic (plastic) fiber, often blended with other fibers to make cloth.

15 - "Marfak", a tradmarked grease of Texaco Oil and gasoline stations. The makers of the video misspelled it as "Marfac".
This song was originally posted on protestsonglyrics.net
16 - Melmac, an American Cyanimid Corp., trademarked name for melamine plastic.

17 - Orlon, a Dupont Corp., trademarked name for their acrylic fibers used in fabric.

18 - Korlan, a Dow Chemical Company trademarked name for O,O-Dimethyl O-(2,4,5-trichlorophenyl)-phosphoro-thioate, a now discontinued insecticide.

19 - Accutron, the name of Bulova's electronic watch. It had no digital number, but it was a crystal-controlled movement, advancing the hands on the watch.

20 - Teflon, is a Dupont trademark, for Polytetrafluoroethylene polymer (plastic).

21 - Ban-lon, a trademarked name by Joseph Bancroft and Sons, for a process to add crimp and therefore stretch to synthetic yarns.

22 - Blue-Magic Whitener, was from the Cheer laundry detergent advertising campaign that lasted many years. See below for an example from a 1953 advertisement.
This song was originally posted on protestsonglyrics.net
23 - Fastback, a style of sports car with a very sloping back winshield. Example: the Dodge Charger.

24 - Wide-track was a marketing gimmick in the late 1950's and early 1960's implying a vehicle was superior if its wheels were a few centimeters (8-10) farther apart.

25 - Autronic-Eye, first came out in 1952 Oldsmobile and Cadillacs, that sensed the headlights of oncoming traffic from the opposite late, to automatically dim the vechicle headlights until the automobile from the other direction passed. Back in the 1950's and 1960's they were very unreliable.

26 - Volvo, is a maker (and brand) of automobiles.

27 - Platformate, was a name trademarked by Shell, for their gasoline additive that was said to improve gas mileage.

28 - We believe a "Nasograph" was featured in Dristan television commerical around that time, to check nostril air flow. Dristan is a brand of over-the-counter nasal spray and cold tablets.

29 - Naugahyde is pliable vinyl-covered fabric, colored and sometimes textured to look like leather, but much cheaper.

30 - Sorry, we don't know whose advertisements these were, or if they were for a laundry detergent or washing machine manufacturer.

31 - The "Jolly Green Giant", the mascot for "Green Giant" brand canned and later frozen vegetables.

32 - This animated tiger was the advertising mascot for Esso gasoline.

33 - The white knight was the mascot for Ajax detergents at the time.

34 - The advertising campaigns for Hathaway shirts.

35 - Hertz, car rentals.